Tag Archive: Positivity

Corporate Wellness: Is Yours Missing a Critical Ingredient?

The Current State of Corporate Wellness Programs

Workplace wellness programs are missing the key ingredient to true prevention. They focus on early diagnosis, symptom and lifestyle management while ignoring the elephant in the room-the one common factor at the root of everything.

While meeting with a representative of a large regional health system’s workplace wellness division, I asked him what their solution was for addressing stress. He mentioned their EAP (employee assistance program) offered counseling but said that was all they had. He also said many employers recognize that stress has both a negative effect on worker’s health and on their contributions at work. He was excited by our program but when he took the information back to his employer they said they had all the knowledge they needed in-house. If that is true, why are they excluding stress management skills training from their workplace wellness program?

The research about stress is clear. Workplace wellness programs tend to focus on the same areas and stress management skills would help improve the results in every one of them.

Smoking cessation.

Stress plays a role in the ability of individuals to quit smoking and maintain their status as non-smokers. Anxious individuals find it the most difficult to quit. Anxiety and smoking behavior are highly correlated.

Weight Management/Obesity/Anorexia/Bulimia

Researchers have demonstrated that the old paradigm of weight management is too simplistic because it ignores the impact of stress on the digestive system. The digestive system does not function as well when an individual is stressed and chronic stress contributes significantly to the development of diabetes. Stress also results in unhealthy food choices. Food is the number one anxiety drug.

Eating disorders often have their roots in low self-esteem. The design of our program leads to increases in self-esteem, which could provide relief for those who have eating disorders and prevent their development by those who are at risk of developing an eating disorder.

Diabetes Disease Management

The impact of stress on the digestive function has been linked to the development of diabetes. In 2007, the direct cost of diabetes in the United States was 174 billion. Indirect costs included 2.6 billion for absenteeism, 20 billion reduced productivity during work for the employed population, 7.9 billion unemployment from disease-related disability, and 26.9 billion lost productive capacity because of early mortality. Stress also has a direct impact on adherence to recommended treatments.

Physical Inactivity

Stress levels affect whether or not an individual will be active and choose to engage in physical activities. Highly stressed individuals who do not have an ingrained habit of physical activity are unlikely to develop the habit while they are stressed. Despite the fact that physical activity/exercise is often recommended as a dose dependent stress reduction method, such increases in physical activity do not consistently help stressed individuals because they do not feel sufficiently motivated.

Depression

By the time depression has developed, the individuals has typically been suffering from chronic stress for a sustained period of time. We need to educate employees (and the entire population) that tolerating stress is not the appropriate response. Coping until we’re depressed is a strategy that has made depression an epidemic with 10% of the US population suffering from it, according to the CDC.

Why are they not recommending early intervention to address stress? Because they think it requires expensive one-on-one treatment and because of the ridiculous stigma’s associated with mental health. Stress Management skills are simple to understand and implement. They are simple enough that kindergartners can understand the basics. Adults are a little more difficult and take a little longer to teach because they have developed a lot of false premises throughout their life that hinder their ability to adopt strategies that come quickly and easily to younger children. But it is still far from something that requires expensive one-on-one treatment. I can teach auditoriums full of people how to manage stress in meaningful ways that have a positive impact on their work and home lives right away and continue to increase as the techniques are applied.

Even individuals who suffered from repeated bouts of depression have now reported that they have been free of depressive episodes since learning these skills.

Poor Diet/Nutrition

Stress and happiness are opposite ends of the same continuum. Researchers have linked happiness with better food choices. Individuals in the top 25% of optimism scores ate more fresh vegetables, salads, berries, fruit and low fat cheese that other subjects in a research report comparing optimism to dietary habits. A meta-analysis done by researchers at Harvard and published in 2012 concluded that positivity and optimism led to better food choices and better choices about risky behaviors. Our stress management program increases happiness, positivity, and optimism.

Chronic Stress

The common recommendations for managing stress are all dose dependent. That would be fine if there wasn’t a better way, but there is. Dose dependent stress management is the same as taking a prescription pill to manage the symptoms-it does nothing to affect the underlying cause. Dose dependent means you have to do it in order to receive the positive results and if you don’t do it, you don’t get any results.

Because our program helps individuals change the root cause of the stress, it functions more like a cure. It does not prevent bad things from happening, but the response is more resilient, emotional intelligent, and less stressful than it would have been before they learned to use the skills we teach. The way the individual responds to the same stimulus that may have once made him or her highly stressed may not be at all stressful once the techniques have been applied for a while.

We all know that everyone reacts differently to circumstances. What stresses one person out may be fun to another person. I’ve studied what makes humans thrive for two decades and then developed programs that teach individuals how to develop the habits of thought that help them thrive.

The frequently recommended dose dependent stress reduction methods include exercise, going out in nature, helping someone else, petting your cat or dog, meditation, yoga, tai chi, and massage. While these methods are a good “pill,” they do not provide long-term benefits with the exception of a consistent meditation practice. But even consistent meditation does not address stress at the root cause.

Some recommendations can be counter-productive. One commonly recommended stress reduction method is to discuss the problem with a friend. The outcome of that discussion can go either way. I definitely have friends who would make it worse by focusing on the worse aspects of the situation and reminding me of other bad situations like the current one. I also have friends who would be beneficial to talk to but I’ve never seen this type of recommendation come with recommended parameters for the discussion.

Employee Engagement

This is not a typical focus of Corporate Wellness Programs although the hope is that the program will be perceived in a positive light. Our program also helps engagement in a variety of ways. The first is that it helps create a more inclusive and positively focused employee base. Working with people who are energetic, focused, and optimistic creates synergy and an environment that makes being at work enjoyable. The way any individual views his employer or any other aspect of his life reflects how he views everything in life. Someone who is generally dissatisfied with life is generally dissatisfied with her work. The reason for this is because our habits of thought play a tremendous role in the aspects we focus on in every area of our lives. If we focus on the aspects that we don’t like, we’re not engaged. If we focus on aspects that we find exciting, our engagement increases.

The inherent nature of our program increases the likelihood that employees will focus on aspects of their jobs and the company that they like.

Turnover/Retention

One of the most frequently cited reasons for turnover is not liking the people. A working environment where relationships are harmonious, where workplace conflict is unusual, where conversations are fruitful, and others are supportive would be very difficult to leave. The techniques I teach can accomplish this type of shift in corporate culture. Individuals who understand how to use the skills can even ignore outright attempts to upset their equilibrium without feeling stressed or a need to retaliate. The techniques provide individuals with tremendous stability and equilibrium in their chosen emotional stance.

There is a song by Pharrell Williams that describes the steady emotional state:

“Here come bad news talking this and that, yeah,
Well, give me all you got, and don’t hold it back, yeah,
Well, I should probably warn you I’ll be just fine, yeah,
No offense to you, don’t waste your time
Here’s why

Because I’m Happy”

I know, that to someone who is not generally happy the thought of being around a bunch of happy people is not very appealing but when everyone understands they can be happy and most are, the whole dynamic changes. Those who need a bit of help find it everywhere they look because one of the most natural and frequent behaviors those who learn to be happier demonstrate is a desire to help others do the same.

Research shows that positively focused people are kinder and demonstrate better corporate citizenship.

Cognitive Ability

Stress diminishes our cognitive abilities. The same person is smarter when happy than he is when stresssed. Do you want your employees to make better decisions? Teach them how to reduce the stress in their lives. You can keep the same employees and gain a smarter workforce.

Absenteeism

Immune function decreases as stress increases. Research has shown that the severity of colds and flu are directly tied to positivity, wth the most positively focused experiencing the fewest symptoms and duration of illness. The most positively focused have sometimes not developed an illness at all, even after being deliberately exposed to the virus. The symptoms are not just self-reports. One study in particular actually measured symptoms, going as far as to weigh used tissues so that the results would not be slanted by the more pessimistic attitude. The pessimists reported more symptoms but they also had more symptoms.

Productivity/Presenteeism

The level of productivity is important to employers. In all except the most mindless, repetitive occupations repeated research has shown that optimists produce more than pessimists.

Although you may believe optimism and pessimism are inborn traits, they aren’t. They are habits of thought and individuals can change their habits of thought to make their life feel better.

Optimists are more successful than pessimists in study after study.

Sales

There is very solid evidence that even less qualified optimists outperform more qualified pessimists based on traditional measures of qualification. If optimism is not one of the considerations for hiring your sales staff you are leaving a lot of untapped potential on the table. Teaching your sales staff our stress management techniques would improve sales.

Ethics/Morality

The research is very clear that ethical behavior improves as positivity increases. Think about it. When the economy dips, white collar crime increases. The same stress that reduces cognitive ability leads individuals to faulty conclusions that result in them deciding to commit a crime.

Education Components

There are a number of false premises that hinder individuals from becoming happier and less stressed. One of them is that they should just be strong when they are faced with stressful situations. But the advice, such as think positive and decrease the stress in your life, is worthless without teaching them how.

Stress adversely affects every system in the body fairly quickly. It is something that should be dealt with as soon after it is experienced as possible. I’ll give you an example. Jealousy creates stress in the body. I am almost never jealous of anyone about anything. I recognize that feeling jealous is my seeing someone else experience something that I want but am perceiving I can’t be, do, or have. Earlier today I learned a friend was at a lecture at Harvard on psychoneuroimmunology and I felt jealous. I told my partner to tell our friend I was jealous (he was going to see him before I did). But I manage my emotional state to a really good place. I had not felt jealousy in a very long time. It did not feel good. Within less than five minutes I realized what I was doing and said, “Why am I feeling jealous? Why do I think that is something I can’t do?” Very quickly my jealous was gone, replaced by an attitude of being delighted that I have friends who attend those types of lectures and can intelligently discuss such subjects. I also affirmed that there was no reason I could not also attend a lecture like that. My jealousy is completely gone and I am now excited about the next time I’ll see my friend. I’m looking forward to hearing what he learned and comparing ideas. I can even ramp my emotional state up even higher. I know this man’s heart wants to help a lot of people, especially those who are the last to receive help, whether here in the USA or abroad. I can think about what he might have learned that will help him do that and feel even more positive emotions. I’ll stop there but the process could keep going. I’ve already shifted from jealousy to a bit of a natural high just by changing my perception but I have not begun to tap the potential positive emotions I could milk from this situation.

Do, however, notice that the circumstances did not change. He is still the one who attended the lecture. The only thing that changed was the only thing I could change, my perspective about it. My emotions improved as I assumed a more empowered perspective. My body no longer feels stress from assuming an unhealthy perspective.

I’ve been using these methods for years but it is not much more difficult for a novice to shift perspective and gain similar advantages.

We need to change our tolerance of stress. We need to help everyone understand that they should do what they can as soon as they can. It makes all the difference.

There are other false premises that interfere with optimal health that our program identifies and changes.

Attracting Quality

Attracting quality employees is critical to the success of your business. The iconic work cultures of our era will not have anything on a company that has incorporated the techniques in our program. You’ll have your pick of the best of the best-provided you provide a healthy work environment with opportunities to advance. Our program won’t change what your company does, only how it does it. There is another benefit I have not yet mentioned, that can help create an irresistible work environment.

Creativity

Creativity is just like cognitive ability as it related to stress. Creativity increases as happiness increases and decreases as stress increases. Ideas flow more readily to individuals who are positively focused. There is a second advantage that comes from our program that relates to this area. Many good ideas are wasted because the person who thinks them is afraid of how others will perceive the idea. Our program increases self-confidence and also the ability to feel good even if someone does not agree with us. The impediments that cause many good ideas to die before they are born is eliminated.

Diversity

Even diversity is positively impacted by our program. Research shows that positively focused individuals are naturally more inclusive. We have the ability to take your diversity initiatives to a higher level.

Resilience

We spend a lot of time planning for business continuity in the event of problems from busted water lines to epidemics and wars. But we tend to ignore the fact that people are required to execute those plans. In the disaster planning milieu, we assume people who are not directly taken out by the disaster will be functioning in their assigned roles. We forget that different people respond to stress in different ways and that the stress of a disaster could take out people who are not affected by the direct cause.

The best disaster plan you can create is worthless if your employees lack the resilience to persist during a disaster. Can they fulfill their duties in the midst of so much uncertainty?

I would far rather have resilient people and a mediocre plan than a great plan and staff with mediocre resilience levels. The resilient individual will retain the ability to think in dire circumstances that will be lost to someone who is less resilient. The best planning cannot predict all the variables. The resilient individual will be able to respond in the moment-when it counts. Those hero’s we love to watch on TV, who come through when bullets and bombs are all around? They’re resilient. Whether you adore MacGyver or Jack, it is their resilience that makes them able to persevere. My Dad tells me, Jeanine you could fall into an outhouse and you’d come out with a diamond ring. He has seen me repeatedly respond to circumstances that would devastate less resilient individuals in ways that make the outcome better than if the adversity had never happened.

Our program increases individual resilience, the ability to bounce back will be improved. It won’t matter if the strife is at work or personal, it will not drag them down as long as it would have without our training.

Sleep

Stress can adversely affect the ability to get a good night’s sleep in a number of ways. Stress can cause individuals to stay awake worrying about problems and it can cause them to wake up too early and be unable to go back to sleep. The stress of too many competing priorities can result in individuals simply not giving themselves enough time for adequate rest.

This is a significant concern to employers. Sleep deprivation can lead to more mistakes, including accidents. Inadequate sleep increases the risk of an automobile accident by three times.

Stress management skills reduce stress, allowing individuals to benefit from a better night’s sleep.

Emotional Intelligence (EQ)

Our program increases EQ in three of the four key areas because of the way the program is designed.

Final Question

Does your corporate wellness program offer a stress management solution that satisfies your needs? Does it address stress at the root cause? Why not?

Contact us today to learn more about how Happiness 1st Institute can help your company achieve a lot more of its potential.


The Best Employee Engagement Solution

The Best Solution for HR’s Biggest Problem: Employee Engagement

Or, more specifically, how to increase employee engagement and retention.

Low engagement can act like a virus, spreading discontent throughout your organization, reducing productivity and increasing undesired turnover. The success of an organization can be tied directly to the level of employee engagement-it affects every area of the business.

The number of employees who would like to leave their current employer was more than 1 in 5 according to a Career Builder survey earlier this year. With turnover costs for lower level employees over $5,000 and many times that for higher level employees, retention is of tremendous importance to the ability of an organization to succeed.

What leads to engagement?

Workers who are dissatisfied with their jobs. Let’s chat about that for a moment. Presumably, at one point the employee was satisfied unless they were desperate for a job, any job, when they accepted the one they have. What changed? Often the employee became dissatisfied with one or more aspects of the role or the company and focused on the negative aspects until the perception of the job matched the perspective about a few undesired areas.

In many cases, this is changeable. It’s a matter of tipping the scale back in your favor and we know how to do that.

Dissatisfaction with advancement opportunities is another reason good talent leaves. It depends on the business model, but this is something that increased creativity can sometimes solve. The techniques we teach facilitate changes that increase creativity. That’s worth talking about.

Being highly stressed is another reason employees look for greener pastures. The skills we teach address the root cause of stress, easing that burden without requiring a change in circumstances. That’s powerful.

54% of the employees who have no intention of leaving their current employer cite liking the people they work with as the number one reason they won’t leave. That’s huge.

What makes co-workers enjoyable to work with? Kindness, collaboration, inclusion are a few of the words that come to mind and our techniques increase everyone of them. Research shows that happier, less stressed people are kinder to one another-even to strangers. They also demonstrate better corporate citizenship. The techniques we teach hit interpersonal conflict head-on and create employees who are able to get along with a wide variety of people and enjoy one another more. That’s gold.

Because our strategy addresses the root cause of so many problems, it improves the entire system.

Talk to us. We can help.

 


Self-Help with a Scientific Foundation; Suitable for Corporate Environments

Helping to Create a Better World…

Until now, self-help and corporate environments have not been good friends. Happiness 1st Institute bridges the gap with scientifically supported stress reduction, optimism increasing skills that are both practical and effective.

The programs we offer are groundbreaking in numerous ways.

The tremendous benefits of decreasing stress and increasing optimism are great for employees, employers, and even customers. Employers benefit from increased engagement, reduced conflict, increased cognitive abilities, and increased emotional intelligence. Employees gain practical skills that make life feel more enjoyable without requiring circumstances to change. The skills improve their relationships at work and in their private lives. They also gain health benefits because stress decreases immune function which helps their bodies natural defenses keep them healthier. Customers prefer to deal with happy and positive employees so their level of satisfaction increases.

If you have salespeople, you may already know that optimistic sales people outsell even better qualified pessimists.

Our program checks all the boxes because the root cause of so many undesired things is the same — chronic stress.

Empowering employees with practical skills that enable them to reduce stress in every area of life, they become happier, more satisfied, healthier and smarter. Yes, smarter. Research is very clear that stress reduces cognitive function and optimism increases it.

Reducing stress has benefits that make many other things easier. Stressed bodies do not process food as well as bodies that are not stressed. Weight management is no longer defined as calories in-calories out. The new definition considers stress and mood, both of which impact how the body processes food and the food choices a person will make, with improved mood associated with healthier food choices.

Chronic stress is often the factor that leads to unhealthy behaviors such as alcohol and drug abuse, risky lifestyle behaviors, and even makes quitting smoking more difficult.

Ignoring chronic stress, or wearing it as a badge of honor-a common unhealthy habit-can lead to depression and other negative health outcomes. It increases the risk of heart disease, obesity, and diabetes among other things. TRUE Prevention-Optimum Health: Remember Galileo. Wellness from the Root Cause for the 21st Century provides citations that support the statements in this post.

Our society is operating with inaccurate information about the effect of stress and about how much stress is healthy (or not terribly unhealthy, to be more accurate). The decrease in immune function happens quickly enough that researchers have been able to measure changes in very quickly after a stressor is introduced to research subjects. We now know that the negative impact to the immune function, cognitive function, and endocrine systems happen quickly. Stress is not something to “let go” for a while and deal with later. Good stress management requires us to be aware of the increase in stress level when it happens and make smart decisions to proactively apply the stress management skills.

The skills we teach are not the dose dependent techniques commonly recommended. While those do help stress levels, their dose dependent nature has a few pitfalls. The first is that they do not provide long-term benefits. The second is that those who need them the most are least likely to do them. The third is that they treat the symptom, not the root cause of stress. Exercise, helping other people, going outside, petting your cat or dog, and the other most frequently recommended methods are best for short-term relief. For long-term benefits, a skill based approach is best. Even meditation, which varies between dose dependent for those who do not have a consistent practice to providing some long term benefits to those who use it consistently, does not address the root cause of stress.

That is actually good news because that means the best we knew to do in the past has been improved upon, making the potential for good outcomes better than it’s ever been. We refer to our program as self-help with a scientific foundation because each individual is responsible for applying the skills to their own life. But the greatest thing about our program is that applying the skills provides positive emotional feedback each step of the way-creating intrinsic motivation that results in priceless benefits for everyone.

Ask us how we can address your businesses pressing concerns. We’re glad to help.


The absence of negative emotions ≠ the presence of positive emotions.

The absence of negative emotions presence of positive emotions.

“The absence of the negative is not the same thing as the presence of positive emotions.

“The absence of the negative is not the same thing as the presence of the positive. We found that factors such as optimism, life satisfaction, and happiness are associated with reduced risk of cardiovascular disease regardless of such factors as a person’s age, socioeconomic status, smoking status, or body weight,” said lead author Julia Boehm, research fellow in the Department of Society, Human Development, and Health at Harvard School of Public Health.

Chronic positive emotions, optimism, and happiness provide benefits that increase vitality and longevity but also benefits that improve relationships and even success.

Over the years I have found that many individuals accept their current emotional state and have no idea how to change it.

They attempt to be stoic and insist they are “OK” but being OK does not afford the health benefits that happiness does. Nor is it healthy for relationships and it does not contribute to the level of success you experience. We are not in a contest to see who can suffer or endure the longest. In the long run there are not prizes for ignoring your emotional state and toughing it out.

Many see weakness in asking for help yet the path to happiness is often not clear and quick fixes seldom work.

It is possible for anyone to enjoy more positive emotions, optimism and happiness if they know the skills and knowledge that helps them. Often skills are given without the knowledge so people give up because of the lack of knowledge. Sometimes the knowledge is given without the requisite skills.

When you have the whole puzzle the path to happiness is easy to navigate and there is truly no end to how happy an individual can become.

Once you are on the right path it becomes easier and easier as if circumstances are bending over backwards to help you. Those days when things are easy and things seem to fall into place easier than they used to is one of the symptoms you will experience continually as you move toward greater happiness. There are scientifically proven reasons for this and if you take the class you will understand those reasons.

The best health benefits are derived from the higher emotional levels which you would experience as things like love, appreciation, joy, enthusiasm, eagerness, interest, passion, awe, inspiration and so forth. If you are in a low emotional place you won’t get there overnight but you can get there and there are health benefits every step along the path. There are also benefits to your relationships and other activities as well.

Contented is not at the highest levels. It can make a good emotional resting place for a while but many people stop there, because feeling content is not a bad feeling, they stop moving toward the better feeling emotions. The trip is so worth while.

Many people have been taught to put others needs before their own and use that as their excuse to ignore their own emotional needs. Yes, you do need to be happy. Why do you think bodies function better when the person living in it is happy? That evidence is clear and compelling.

So, let’s look at it from the perspective of helping others. The following is based upon scientifically proven benefits of increased positivity.

“When you are happy you are at your best. You are in the best health. You are in the best mood. You are able to think with greater clarity. You are able to see solutions to problems far more readily. You need less from others (pumping up, assistance of all types, etc.). You contribute more by being happy so being happy is a priority for you. When you are happy you contribute to others by inspiring them to happiness. You contribute to others because when you feel great you want to help others feel just as wonderful. Sometimes, when someone feels rotten it makes them feel better to see someone else feel rotten too or see someone who is even worse off then they are. When you are happy it lifts you even higher to help others up and you gain no happiness or relief from their not being in a good place. Minding your happiness is minding your health because when you are happy you will be inclined to make good decisions about your diet and exercise and other habits. Happiness reduces the stress on your body and enables it to more easily maintain or regain its health. Your happiness is good for you and good for the world. Happiness is the path to peace.”

Studies have shown that increased happiness actually reduces racism and increases corporate citizenship.

Aren’t the benefits of happiness the things you want to see in the world? Healthier people being nicer to one another, family and strangers alike? Children confident in themselves - not fake pumped up self esteem - but real, they understand to the core of their being that they can be successful, that they can find solutions to problems, that they can decide to pursue their dreams? Better relationships among people and even peace. In our class you will understand the relationship between peace and happiness.

Interested in our classes? We are accepting enrollments for new classes now.


How to be in the Flow at Work

More Great Days at Work

You know those days when everything just seems to go well? You feel good, you feel like you look good, inspirations come to you, the day just flows?

Think about those days. Aren’t they the ones when you feel happy? The day when you have a smile on your face when you get out of bed for some reason, something you were thinking about that makes you feel happy, some event you are looking forward or an encounter with someone that you are remembering with pleasure or looking forward to?

Now think about the days that seem like Murphy’s Law “If it can go wrong, it will” would be an accurate description of the day. Aren’t those days the ones when you did not feel all that great when you started the day? Sure, maybe you stubbed your toe, but even before then, were you thinking about having to do something you did not want to do or trying to figure out how to do something you wanted to do but did not think you could?

How happy you are impacts greatly the type of day you have, which impacts the type of week, month and year you have.

Most people believe that some people are just naturally inclined to happiness more than others but that is a myth. It is something society has reached a false conclusion upon and most people buy into it.

Happiness can be learned. I don’t say it can be taught because the student must do the work; no one can do it for them. But, if the student is willing and has a desire to be happier and a belief that it is possible anyone can learn to be happier.

How happy can someone learn to be? Very, very happy, joyful even is quite possible and it does not matter where the student is when they begin. They can get there. The 2nd best news, after knowing that anyone can learn to be happier is that the life circumstances of the individual desiring to be happier do not matter in the level of happiness that can be achieved.

However, life circumstances can improve greatly when the person becomes happier.

Not only can greater levels of happiness be reached by learning how to be happier, they can be maintained at a higher set point than they were before the individual learned how to deliberately choose happiness.

Why would an employer care about the happiness of employees? There are myriad reasons but two areas are of high importance to employers.

There is a scientifically documented positive correlation between employee happiness and productivity. There is also a scientifically documented correlation between happiness and wellness.

Employers want productive employees. They also want employees who come to work and employees who tend to be healthy. Happiness is far more effective than gym membership benefits and other wellness initiatives offered by many employers.

A happy employee who feels good and feels good about himself or herself does not need to be incented to be physically active. They will feel like doing those things because the idea of doing them will feel good to them in ways it does not feel good when they are not happy or do not have a good self image.

It is not necessary to have a model-perfect body to feel good about oneself. Someone who does not feel good about themselves has thoughts flowing through their mind like “Why should I bother? I won’t get a date with _____ anyway” or “I am uncomfortable going to a gym because I don’t like being looked at and I don’t like what I think others think when they see me there.”

Someone who is happy will have very different thoughts. “It feels so good to move my body. I really enjoy coming here. I don’t know why I did not do this sooner but I am glad I am doing it now.”

One of the major changes learning to be happy creates is a switch in the thoughts we think.

Additionally, recently there were 17 states that had passed or had pending legislation to protect against work place bullying. The consistent aspect of the legislation is putting the onus on the employer to prevent such behavior. When we really think about this we realize that, except in the most egregious of situations, bullying is in the eye of the receiver. Unfortunately, the legislation is not seeing it from this angle and puts employers in a somewhat untenable situation. While a co-worker or even a boss could say something to a happy person and it would be perceived as that person trying to get their way, perhaps being pushy but certainly nothing to call Human Resources about much less hire an attorney over whereas another employee, perhaps one who generally feels like a victim, experiencing the same circumstances would feel very bullied. This legislation seems to put employers in a powerless situation.

However, helping employees learn to be happy can totally remove that “I am a victim, I am powerless” attitude toward life that some individuals have developed. This would directly impact how the individual would respond to the same circumstances which would reduce the likelihood of them feeling they had been bullied.

Another major benefit of happier employees is better customer interactions. Don’t you love it when the person who serves you is happy? Whether it is the waiter or waitress, the airline steward, the receptionist who takes your call, or anyone else you interact with?

Think about the impact on your business if your employees begin smiling more often with genuine smiles. Happy people tend to feel more caring toward others so customers would feel more genuine warmth when the employee asks “How are you?” The benefits of happier employees are vast. Also, it is very difficult to complain about someone who is very pleasant to you, even if they happen to make a mistake the customer is more likely to not make a big deal about it as long as it is resolved.

I want to circle back to the beginning now. To those days that just go well. Don’t the good ideas just flow to you on those days? Imagine managers who deliberately tune themselves to a happy state and have those days routinely. Where the solutions appear almost before the problem is fully known. Think how smoothly your business would run with managers like that. You don’t need new managers to have that; you just need the ones you have to learn to be happier.

The positive impact on your employees and your business are assured when your employees learn to be happier.

Why does anyone do anything? In the final analysis, they do it because they believe it will make them feel better. Even the individual who goes to a job they hate every day does so because they feel better getting the paycheck than they would if they did not get the paycheck.

Happiness is equal to the highest of human desires. Only being authentic and love rank as high as happiness in study after study. Happiness consistently outranks wealth, success, fame, status, attractiveness, sex, health, and enlightenment in the same studies.

Many studies are cited on our website.

Classes are offered in person and on-line. Everyone who does the work and is willing to believe they can be happier will experience a sustainable increase in the level of their own happiness. Prices vary based on class size and method of delivery. In person classes away from the Charlotte, NC area are available for groups. Classes can also be designed with a mix of both in person and online delivery. Individualized coaching sessions are also available and can be very beneficial for anyone enduring severe situations including severe health issues. Attitude can be everything in successfully overcoming health issues and individual coaching can contribute greatly to a positive attitude.


Your 6th Sense-Use it

Your 6th Sense

The one they will soon be teaching in schools near you

In early elementary school children are taught about the five senses, sight, smell, sound, taste, and touch. What would it be like to not understand that these senses were providing information about the world around us to help us navigate the path to our desires? What if we did not connect what the senses told us to our environment? How much less functional would that make us?

We all have a sixth sense that has been ignored. We actually have far more than five senses. The sense of urgency to use the bathroom is a sense. Hunger and thirst are senses. But this one, revealed by new research, is often ignored and that equates to lives lived far below their potential. Their potential for what? Health, happiness, great relationships, emotional well-being, success, and achievement.

New research from Harvard, courtesy of the brilliant mind of Katherine Peil, and ten pages of cross disciplinary scientific research cited in her paper, Emotion: A Self-regulatory Sense, demonstrates clearly that our emotions are a sense. In fact, her position is that emotion is our oldest sense and she uses molecular biology and the biophysical processes of living systems to lead us step-by-step through this idea.

The world is about to get much better for many people. Those who have not understood that our emotions provide us with guidance, a True North feedback guiding us to divine goodness and love, have been living in more darkness than a lack of vision would cause.

Positive Psychology has been giving us a great deal of information about the benefits of positive emotions, optimism, and happiness over the past few decades including that they reduce the risk of cardiovascular disease by 50%, improve the immune function, help us create better relationships and be more successful among many other benefits. Our website has documented benefits to individuals, businesses, charities, communities, and health with many scientific citations.

I have copied heavily from Ms. Peil’s paper with quotes indicated in italics. Please follow the link to her full paper and read it if you are at all interested in this topic. The excerpts below, while copious, do not begin to have the depth contained in her paper. The excerpts are primarily focused on information that lends itself to the import of our emotional guidance system and our best responses. The detailed science that leads to this conclusion is not covered at length via these excerpts nor are other pertinent details to a full understanding and discussion. All page number references are to Ms. Peil’s paper, Emotions: A Self-regulatory System.

Katherine Peil’s model is “the first model devoid of neurocentricity and rooted in the fundamental hard-science biophysical principals beyond the conventional interpretation of Darwinian evolution“.

In addition to unifying many seemingly separate and unrelated bodies of literature, this model affords science a pioneering inroad into the territory of values - the “spiritual judgments’ according to the great William James (1958). (pg 22)

Much of the positive psychology literature points to feeling that we are fulfilling a larger purpose is important to individual happiness. Ms. Peil’s model provides great insight in how to obtain a sense of purpose, “the model places purpose in an evolutionary context, with both positive and negative relating to universal self-regulatory purposes to which the biovalues of all living systems are tethered. Indeed, to recognize our teleological end directed purposes is to fill a “gaping hole” in our understanding of our world and our place within it — “the intrinsic value in humankind” (Deacon, 2011). In fact, given the emerging global village, science is clearly needed to weigh in on the issue of values lest we retreat into conflicting religious fundamentalisms (Kaufman, 2008; Harris, 2010).

Ms. Peil has great courage in presenting this model which has, to my delight, presented a“much more optimistic portrait of human nature — if not of nature itself. It suggests that cohesion, cooperation and adaptive creativity are as deeply rooted in our evolutionary history as red-in-tooth-and-claw competition and random mutation. It suggests that nature is green with grace and embrace; balancing self-preservationary necessities with self-developmental synergy.”

She describes our emotional sense as “a feedback loop in a circular stimulate-response relationship where the output of a system is fed back into itself serving as stimulus for a subsequent round of output responses. It provides feedback in perfect accordance with harmful or environmental stimulus. In doing so, it accomplishes an optimizing developmental adaption - saying “yes” to beneficial changes — or a self-preservationary intervention, saying “no” to potentially self-destructive harms.”

In other words, listening to and understanding the information from our emotional guidance system (EGS) helps us optimize our self-development and helps us avoid harmful environments and situations. The guidance from our EGS is customized to our own specific goals. An individual who wants to become a nurse will receive guidance from her EGS that furthers that goal. An individual who wants to become a great ball player will receive guidance from his EGS that furthers that goal. Our guidance leads us to better feeling emotions, whether it is away from fear in a harmful environment or toward becoming the most we can imagine being. The science has been very clear that those who are stable in higher emotional states contribute more to others, their families, co-workers, communities, and beyond. They are more altruistic and more apt to lend a helping hand to friends and strangers alike. Following our emotional guidance is the way to achieve sustainably positive emotional states.

Ms. Peil’s model refutes the value of suppressive forms of emotion regulation. “In this new view our binary feel-good/feel-bad hedonic feelings remain the conscious mind’s only valid informational tether to the biophysically right/wrong conditions required for life itself. and an innate safeguard against its more volitional -yet potentially dishonest (Greene & Plaxton, 2009) — rationalizations and hypocrisies (Valdesolo & DeSteno, 2008). Instantly, they (emotions) offer both a reality check and a behavioral fix. Their elegant stimulus-response mechanics moves us to actively avoid self-destruction and create evolutionary self-development, and their simple tit-for-tat logic constantly reminds us of these dual universal purposes.”

“Moreover, suppression does not work. For whether or not the informational component of the emotional message is deliberatively and rationally incorporated into the cognitive schemata (building conscious, reasoned motives) the coupled corrective response will simply forge them into the mindscape.”

“It conceptually reunites “the self” as a functional whole bridging the gap left by the Cartesian severance of mind from body and the many illusory divides, judgments and assumptions that would follow. Particularly those that privileged reason over emotion and conscious and intentional processes over intuitive, embodied cognition and Naïvesensory perceptions.”

The HeartMath Institute conducted a study that showed the heart registered responses in a predictive manner, while the brain responded after the fact to the same stimuli.[i] Placing reason over intuition and discounting intuition has been a mistake that it is time to rectify.

“Indeed, the appraisal themes of the four basic negative emotions - loss (sadness), imminent danger (fear), contamination (disgust), and disempowering obstacles to agency or social violations (anger) - move us to either change the immediate environmental circumstances or alter our location, to “fight” or “take flight”. To which I would add: to make right, a previously unacknowledged more adaptive, creative problem solving response to emotional distress, born of the self-developmental imperative and the approach mode of behavior.”

To me the above statement found on page 14 of her paper, is the most empowering and important aspect. It highlights a higher road that humans can take from the traditional ‘flight or fight responses”. This is the path on which solutions to many social concerns we have been wrestling with for decades (and in some cases, centuries) will be solved.

“Indeed, instead of suppression or behavioral avoidance, a Right Response (RR) is one that involves an active, adaptive, rebalancing of the ecologically optimal (biophysically favorable) rational state between the organism and the environment. The RR has been captured in the stress literature as problem-focused coping (Pearlin & Schooler, 1978); Folkman, Lazarus, Gruen, & DeLongis, 1986) or transformational coping (Chen, 2006), as perhaps the most adaptive way of reducing the psychophysiological arousal tension (Haines & Williams, 1997). This can happen in one of two ways. It can involve an active adaption of the immediate external environment, which is what we call creative action or “work”, and it is how we accomplish cultural evolution.” See page 14 of the paper for specific examples.

“Likewise, the RR can also be affected to the internal environment, the personal mindscape, in conscious knowledge acquisition, in an act of deliberate learning and personal growth, an accountable answer to the distress call. Another mental tactic is to invoke optimal belief structures to reappraise (Lazarus, 1991) or temporarily endure a challenging or uncontrollable situation; or to bear an injustice or misfortune with relative grace and ‘resilience.” (Seery, 2011). This internal RR is also known as “self-control” (Tabibnia, Satpute, & Lieberman, 2008; “self-discipline” (Duckworth & Seligman, 2005), or perhaps “grit” (Duckworth, Kirby, Tsukayama, Berstein, & Ericsson, 2011), the ability to endureshort-term pain in order to cultivate long-term complex pleasure (captured by the body builder’s lament “no pain no gain). But there is a vast difference between a RR and suppressive emotion regulation, as the corrective action itself is informed by the specific emotional message, is consciously undertake, and it self-preserves through open, approach behavior, adaptive development and social cooperation.”

“In Short, the RR is a self-developmental response more indicative of the neurally well-endowed, culturally creative human being, if not all social primates. In fact, the developmental benefits of the internal RR also concern the perceived boundary between self and other, delivering what philosopher Peter Singer (1983) deems “the expanding circle” of concern for non-kin social others. This occurs when the empathic understanding of universal distress allows the broadening of one’s identity boundary such that the concerns, well-being and interests of unfamiliar others (or ‘outgroups’) become “self-relevant” as well.”

“In short, in context of the feedback cycle, despite the primacy of pain, the modern behavior toolkit includes a creative approach response as well as avoidant reactions to emotional distress. When feeling out of balance, we can take flight or fight in defense, or we can capitalize upon our neural endowments, stay in approach mode and correctively “right” the problematic agent, Indeed, the RR should be the first choice reaction and constitute the greatest percentage of all corrective responses. But, despite such efforts, unacceptable environmental conditions persist over time, then more assertive and aggressive (yet non-hostile) confrontational “fight” responses become appropriate, until finally a “flight” to more habitable and just environments becomes the only viable options. But whether the situation dictates a Right, Flight, or Flight response, the primary objective is to immediately identify and reduce the internal or external environmental conditions that are triggering the distress in order to self-preserve.”

“The complex feelings[ii] call for internal environmental corrections — righting one’s personal mindsscape as a captain would right his sailboat in response to winds of change. Indeed, when it comes to the mindscape, fight and flight defenses are tantamount to denying the wind itself, they are maladaptive, they are wrong”.

“In sum, RRs are the mechanism for conscious, intentional, and ultimately “reasoned” learning. Such optimal self-regulatory responses promote good health (Bandora, 2005), spur both individual and social self development, and create neural structures that deliver optimal feed forward control, including empathic understanding that afford others the egalitarian respect, compassion and forgiveness required by the trial and error nature of emotional sensory self-regulation. …. It should be no surprise that unresolved emotional distress is unhealthy — if not self-destructive — as an abundance of literature suggests (Sternberg, 2001; Segerstrom & Miller, 2004).”

“The good news, however, is that suppressive approaches to emotion regulation often overlook the positive eustress signals and their “Yes! Go! - This-is-good-for-me!” messages, the natural rewards for optimal self-regulation.” See page 15 for details on benefits to individuals and society.

“Indeed, the positive emotions pull us onto an optimal — right track — of life, a richly meaningful (Peterson, 2007), morally virtuous (Aristotle, 1985), spiritually integrated and evolved (Wilber, 2006; Vailant, 2008), creatively engaged, and socially connected state of flourishing (Seligman, 2011), all by simply “following our bliss” (Campbell, 2004). Indeed, the fourfold over representation of basic negative emotions is counterbalanced by a “positivity ration”, where nearly three times as many positive as negative interactions are required to prevent group fragmentation and individual languishing (Losada & Fredrickson, 2005), which I would ague, occurs naturally if we are responding ‘rightly’ to our painful emotional messages.”

“Indeed, the moral logos of the emotional sense suggests that win-win cooperation motivated by positive emotion is the long-term rule, and that win-lose fight-and-flight competition driven by self-preservationary pain is the short-term exception. Likewise, it suggests that the role of emotions such as basic anger, sadness, disgust, and complex trust, gratitude, love, and compassion have largely gone unnoticed in rationalist models of economics, game theory, and interpersonal decision making (Lerner, Small, & Lowenstein, 2004; Han, Lerner, & Keltner, 2007). In sum, it suggests that nature is green with grace and embrace, that we enjoy a self-developmental impetus for creative adaption, that evolution is constructive because of cooperation (Novak, 2006), and that as Dacher Keltner (2009) put it, we are “born to be good”.

The implications for social advancement are enormous. “In sum, the universal right track of human development delivers an optimal suite of complex emotional perceptions and a fully functional moral compass, perhaps even at surprisingly young ages, Furthermore, the moral wisdom delivered by this optimal trajectory is also echoed in common religious mores, the virtues and values identified by the Institute of Global Ethics (Loges & Kidder, 1996), the positive psychology Values-in Action taxonomy of human strengths (Peterson & Seligman, 2004,) and it resonates from within well-being advice across the mental and physical health sciences. But in terms of evolutionary theory, emotion has never been given its rightful due, and the tremendous adaptive value of positive emotion has remained obscured by the notion that all pleasure is simply the handmaiden of sexual reproduction.”

Emotions have been given a bad rap despite great scientific evidence to the contrary. See page 19 for examples. “Such slander about our visual, auditory, “olfactory, or gastatory sensory processes would be unlikely and we consider ourselves disabled unless all senses are interact yet this attitude prevails (regarding our emotional guidance sense). Clearly, we have blamed the messenger while missing its primal self-regulatory message. We have chosen to suppressively regulate our emotions instead of allowing them to regulate us. Indeed, while suppression is little more than self-deception, our cultural traditions encourage us to deny our feeling signals with strategies ranging from religious taboos and admonishments to socially refined and politically correct manners, and even to powerful psychotropic drugs. But in doing so, we’ve run our optimal moral rails onto the wrong track.”

The biological emotion of disgust, for example, is designed to apprise us of contamination, diseases, bacterial overgrowth, and the avoidance of infection threat (Curtis, 2001, 2007). “Maladaptive beliefs can harness and redirect the basic emotions to preserve ideologies rather than the body itself. . . . In short, conserving maladaptive beliefs can completely and “disregulate” our emotions (Bauneister, 1997, Peterson & Flanders, 2002, Dias-Ferreira, Sousa, Melo, Morgado, Mesquita, Cerqueira, Costa & Sousa, 2009), and ultimately help manifest the host of psychiatric ‘affective disorders’ described by the DSM. in sum, by choosing the suppressive strategy humanity has not only violated the simple directive to reduce the physical and sociocultural conditions that elicit painful emotions, but we have compromised them by adding an entirely new man-made layer of social distress to the external environment - the complex negative emotions.’

Furthermore, given the emotional system’s ancient roots in self-regulatory signaling, such tactics are a recipe for personal disaster. As noted above, sociocultural structures that exploit negative emotion in this manner create a lingering state of distress (Dickerson & Kemery, 2004) that sets the epigenetic stage for compromised immune function, ill health, and maladaptive development. Indeed, through epigenetic pathways, stressful events become biologically embedded — they get ‘under the skin’ — during developmental windows crucial to the forging of neural circuitry (Hertzman & Boyce, 2010) as well as DNA damage that accelerates degerative aging (Hara, Kovacs, halen, Rajagopal, Strachan, Grant, Towers, Williams, Lam, Xiao, Shenoy, Gregory, Ahn, Duckett, & Lefkowitz, 2011). It is now well documented that environmental factors such as maltreatment, family adversity, marital conflict, maternal depression, and even financial distress are being linked with cognitive deficits and socio-emotional behavioral problems in children (Kahnsari, Murgo, & Faith, 1990), Burchinal, Roberts, Hooper & Zeisel, 2000; Boyce et al, 2001; Tsigos, & Chrousos, 2002; Caspi et al, 2002; Cummings & Davies, 2002; Essex, Klein, Cho & Kalin, 2002; Patel & Kleinman, 2003; Mastern & Shaffer, 2006; Van Ijzendoorn & Bakermans-Kraneriburg & Van Ijzendoorn, 2007; Boyce, 2007; Kleinman, 2010). ………..(see page 20 for different descriptions) …. but by any name, they reflect the self-regulatory feedback dynamics — and epigenetic manifestations of the emotional sense.”

So, the five senses we learned about in school was a woefully incomplete story. Our emotions are sensory output (just as the color of something is sensory output from the interpretation our brain has made about the input). Just like something that tastes bitter is communicating necessary information to us, so too do our emotions communicate information necessary to both maintain health and to thrive.

Suppressing emotions on the negative (bodily preservation) side would be akin to putting Novocain in ones hands and then putting your hands on a hot stove, you might notice that something smelled funny but you would not feel the pain of the hot stove even though your hands are burning. Suppressing negative emotions is no less unhealthy.

Suppressing emotions on the positive side (self-development) would be like eating your favorite delicious high calorie dessert while your mouth is desensitized by Novocain. You would miss all the joy of the experience and not gain the pleasure response.

Suppressing emotions is not the answer.

There are three basic proper responses to emotional output from your emotional guidance system. These are Right, Fight and Flight. Right Responses (RR’s) are by far the preferred method in most situations. Right Responses can be learned. In fact, that is the main purpose of the classes offered by Happiness 1st Institute, to teach individuals Right Responses.

This is new language to us because although we have long recognized that emotions provided guidance it was not until Ms. Peil’s paper that we had scientific support for this knowing or the term Right Responses.

Another aspect that has been well documented by many research studies is that when we become happier we become better behaved individuals. We will be posting a white paper we have been working on for a while, since before we became aware of Ms. Peil’s fabulous research, on the topic of the Importance of Understanding our Emotions. The intent is to offer a plain-English explanation.

When new information becomes available that changes the playing field, the typical slow progress of science, sometimes termed “progress by funeral” indicating it is often not until the old school has passed that new insights can be brought to light and benefit humanity is unacceptable. This is one of those times. I so appreciate Ms. Peil’s willingness to publish this paper with her meticulous research and findings that overturn many prior beliefs across many disciplines. I appreciate her ability to see the potential benefits for humanity that sharing this information can bring about and her willingness to do so.

A new sense is not really that startling. Even though schools continue to teach five senses the emotional sense is not the first new one to be known. Senses are, by definition, the physiological capacities in organism that provide inputs for perception. Far more than five are documented including thermoception, equilibrioception, kinesthesioception, proprioception, and noiception to name a few. Some natural abilities (facilitated by senses) are hunger, thirst, sense of time, fullness of stomach, need to perform bodily functions and more. I make note of this here so that the non-scientist can understand that calling emotions a sense is not far fetched. It is a new, more accurate way of looking at something we have always been aware of. This way of viewing emotions has many advantages for both scientific study and for mankind because of what it says about social problems and their solvability. We are miles closer to solutions as a result of Ms. Peil’s work.

There are many aspects to her paper including an in depth discussion of the difference between basic emotions and complex emotions. There will be resistance from many quarters to retain the status quo for a variety of reasons. This paper, when fully understood, is very empowering to individuals. It also will threaten the ‘need to be right’ that many defend forgetting that they could instead celebrate knowing more than they did when they used to think what they knew was right. A Right Response (RR) would be to understand that prior opinions and/or beliefs were based upon the best information you had at the time. It is fully appropriate to incorporate new information to support new opinions as such information comes to light. In the past you did the best you could with what you had and that is no different than what you are doing today.

In time this paper will be accepted as a historical masterpiece leading to global improvements. Further research and study will increase the already well documented evidence supporting the positions put forward in this paper.

The concept that humans are good and will behave well based upon following their own internal moral compass will be accepted in time as it is demonstrated.

For those who feel their world view is threatened by this they need only change their internal mindscape slightly to remove the threat. Doing so would be considered a Right Response and lead to self development. Within the Biblical scriptures there is great evidence to support that we have guidance so maintaining a Biblical worldview and accepting the premises put forth in this paper is not that far of a stretch. The Bible says that “God is Love”. It also said that “Man was created in His image”. If God is Love and man was created in the image of God then Man is Love. If Man is Love than Man is good. The concept of man as flawed negates our having been made “In His image”. Furthermore, there are many quotes that indicate that we have guidance. A separate document on Happiness 1st Institute’s site discusses this in greater detail, see “Are Emotions Guidance from God?”.

For those who are uncomfortable viewing the emotional guidance system as God leading the way can just see it in the biological sense. If one listens to the guidance, understands its messages and follows the guidance the same benefits will be derived regardless of whether the guidance is attributed to God or something else (at least while here on Earth and I will not take this discussion beyond the Earthly plane).

Understanding emotions as a sense has the potential to positively impact every ‘social problem’ that is of grave concern to many today.

The faster this understanding spreads and is incorporated into our policies, attitudes, behaviors, and beliefs the faster the benefits will be derived.

The science is clear. It is amazing that emotions as a sense has not been discovered/proven previously. The benefits of positive emotions, so well documented over the past 20 years, lends great support.

Positive emotions are more important to our well-being than nutrition, exercise, or even whether we smoke or not based on scientific studies and meta-analyses that have been published. There is a reason for this. We were born to follow our bliss.

Update on citations. Katherine Peil’s groundbreaking paper required expertise from several areas of science for proper peer review. Our scientific system is not set-up to take advantage of groundbreaking research that does that because they want one reviewer to be able to review the entire paper-rather than adopt an intelligent idea-having a committee comprised of experts from each field review the paper. Hopefully this will become acceptable in the future. As a result the paper was not able to be published in the original form as it was cited “in press” in various blogs on my site. It was modified and eventually peer reviewed and published in Global Advances in Health and Medicine in March 2014. I had access to early versions and many have quotes from those versions in various parts of my work. The inability to be successfully peer reviewed is not due to a lack in her work but to a lack in the current scientific norms for evaluating groundbreaking work. It was humanity’s loss that this work was delayed several years in reaching the public because of this.

[i] Rollin, McCraty, Mike Atkinson, and Raymond T. Bradley, “Electrophysiological Evidence of Intuition. Part 1: The Surprising Role of the Heart,” Journal of Alternative and Complementary Medicine 10(1) (2004), pp. 133 - 143

[ii] For a complete explanation of “complex feelings” please see Emotions: A Self-Regulatory System cited above.


Two Kinds of Happiness

Two kinds of happiness

There are two kinds of happiness. One is transitory and the other is sustainable.

The transitory type of happiness is the one many people think of when they think of happiness. Our advertising community promotes this type of happiness. The current Coco-Cola advertisement is one example. The ad conveys that if you drink Coca Cola you will be happy.

Another ad campaign indicates that traveling to Costa Rica will make you happy.

Yet another ad indicates that having the right shoes will make you happy.

Because I am tuned into and understand happiness I notice this type of misleading advertising often.

The message people receive is to look outside themselves for happiness. That what they own, or do, is what will make them happy. There is nothing wrong with desire. It is natural and provides a natural, intrinsic form of motivation. It is our perception that achieving the desire is the basis of our happiness that prevents so many from ever achieving more than momentary bits of happiness.

Happiness, true happiness, provides life promoting benefits to all our bodily functions: brain, immune system, chemical balance and so much more. It is far too important to allow these misleading and damaging infomercials for momentary pleasure to continue.

It is true that a new car will make you happy, for an afternoon (maybe even for a week). But this type of happiness requires constant care and feeding. It is actually a prison. It can only be sustained with constant attention.

Research supports this. Even big life events such as your own wedding or a long awaited promotion provide only transient happiness.

We ask ourselves, is that all there is?

The empty feeling that accompanies the disappearance of the transient happiness, especially after achievement of a long sought prize, can be devastating.

Fortunately, there is a different type of happiness. This second type of happiness is sustainable without the need to constantly feed it with new achievements, acquisitions and relationship highs.

Those things help maintain it but this second type of happiness is more about how an individual perceives life. It about whether the glass is half full or half empty but with a deep understanding and deliberate choice to look on the bright side. Anyone, even life long pessimists, can learn to view life more optimistically.

Why would you want to do this?

Well, first and foremost, life is just more fun and feels better when you do. Isn’t that why you do everything you do, because you believe you will feel better if you do it (or in some cases if you do not do it)? You want that promotion because you believe you will feel better if you have it than if you do not have it. You want the new car because that feels better than driving an unreliable old car. It is at the root of all your decisions, whether conscious or not.

But there are many more benefits. The last 20 years some scientists have turned their attention to studying human thriving. The findings have astounded them and are great news for us. Positive emotions, optimism, and happiness confer tremendous benefits in the form of improved health and immune function, better relationships and greater success. Information about these benefits and scientific citations supporting them are available on our website, Happiness1st.com.

Learning how to develop and maintain the sustainable type of happiness is fun and easy with the right knowledge and tools.

Jeanine Joy is the Founder and President of Happiness 1st Institute. We teach the skills that lead to sustainable happiness-the kind that can extend your life and more importantly, the number of healthy years in your life.


Negative Thoughts Kill Your Brain Cells

Negative Thoughts Kill (Brain Cells)

So many branches of science are demonstrating the benefit of positivity. Positive and optimistic thoughts are good for us — good for our health, our relationships, our success, and our very ability to think clearly.

I feel great appreciation for the scientists from so many different fields of study who have turned their attention to human thriving. Without their hard work and dedication I would not have been able to weave together a program that provides both the skills and knowledge needed for individuals to successfully think more positively.

I have heard that refrain for most of my life - “Be Positive” or “Look on the bright side” or “Don’t worry, be happy”? It always sounded like good advice but I did not know how for a long time. As I learned how it became clear why so many people attempt to change in this area and fail — I learned the common reasons for not being successful and gathered the resources and knowledge necessary to overcome those common obstacles.

Information was gathered from countless bodies of knowledge. If it could contribute to the truth about how to create greater human thriving I was interested, passionately interested in understanding it.

The programs we offer stand on the shoulders of not one giant, but many giants who came before and without whom we would never have been able to create this magnificent program.

They have provided all the information necessary to help anyone thrive in ways they may have never believed possible. The program empowers individuals to succeed in their well-being, in their relationships, in their earthly pursuits, in following their passion, in understanding their purpose, in all that is important.

Today I happened upon another piece of the puzzle that I am going to share. I love it when science is presented in a clear manner that many people can relate to. I love the masterful way this material is presented. It starts out as if it is religious but it is not - any person of any faith, spiritual belief or atheism can find value in the message in this video.

But, as brilliant as the mind that created it is — he still includes a negative thought in his positive meditation - even though he intends for it to be a positive meditation. As he states, his deepest belief is compassion he pulls himself back to a negative thought by adding that he is not good at being compassionate. This makes it clear that even experts can gain by guidance — that learning to be positively focused takes both knowledge and skills. That is what we provide in our programs at Happiness 1st Institute.

Use the Contact Us area of our website to find out about the new and exciting classes that will help you build more brain cells as well as other products and services.


What will it take to Wake You Up?

What Will It Take to Wake You Up?

Positive emotions are required for your body to function at its peak performance.

Being stoic or tolerating being in a negative state of mind often is unhealthy.

The scientific evidence of this is clear.

We need to care for our bodies and part of caring for our bodies, even more important to their health than whether or not we smoke, is that we enjoy positive emotions often.

Are you still harboring resentment towards a long ago wrong?

Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one getting burned.” - Buddha

Are you holding on to feelings of not being loved enough at some point in your life? That part of your life is over and only your thoughts about it are keeping it alive.

Are you refusing to forgive, believing that they do not deserve your forgiveness? The one you benefit by your forgiveness is you.

To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.” - Lewis B. Smedes

Are you loving yourself? The often quoted verse is “Love thy neighbor as thyself” but many people treat themselves worse than they would their worst enemy in the conversations they have in their own minds and in the mirror. Remember to love yourself. You really cannot love others if you do not love and accept yourself.

You do not have to judge yourself as lacking to decide to improve or change something about yourself. It is perfectly acceptable to be fine as you are and decide to improve something to make yourself even better. Self acceptance means you recognize that you are evolving and becoming throughout life. If you are not all that you desire to be today there is always tomorrow when you will be more than you are today.

Do you spend your commute time angry at the situation? You can make it enjoyable with a little thought and effort.

Do you go to a job you hate every day? There has to be some aspect you can focus upon that will feel better to you.

Decisions are powerful. We can show you the decisions you can make - without any circumstances changing - that will help you be happier. Circumstances have a way of changing to match your state of happiness.

Science has shown that happiness contributes positively to good health, to success and to good relationships.

Ask us how we can help you by contacting us. We have answers that address the root causes and result in real progress towards your dreams, desires, and goals.

We hope this article stimulates discussion. If this article stimulates thoughts, questions, or comments please post them below. The comments are moderated so they will not appear immediately. Comments and questions are taken seriously. By sharing them here rather than sending them by private mail you share with other readers and not just the author. All comments are read and all earnest questions are responded to. If you have something to say that truly applies only to you and me then send me an email. Please feel to share this article with others using the share buttons or by sending them a link to this page. Comments that are not related to the topic of this website or that are blatant advertisements are deleted to preserve the integrity of the site. We look forward to your feedback. If you would like to register for or are interested in additional information on our classes, one-on-one coaching, or speakers for your event please contact us.


Is Your Happiness a Selfish Desire?

The Fallacy of Seeking Ones Own Happiness Being A Selfish Act

This new frontier is such an interesting journey. There are so many common beliefs that are based on false assumptions to overcome. Society has been teaching humans misinformation about happiness for generations. It explains a lot about how things have gotten so bad for so many.

One of the most common fallacies I encounter is the perception that seeking ones own happiness is selfish.

Nothing could be further from the truth.

A happy Mother would never abuse her child. Only unhappy ones ever do.

A happy husband would never abuse his wife. Only an unhappy one would and whether or not he is happy is his issue; no one can make another person happy.

A happy person would not go on a killing spree. Only deeply unhappy people do that.

When an individual is happy there are many benefits that extend to their family, friend, employer and community.

If a scale weighed the individual benefits of happiness against the benefits that individual’s happiness gives to their family, friends, co-workers and community it would be self evident that ones own happiness was not a selfish act.

I am not referring to the transitory happiness that one achieves based on external circumstances. The happiness I refer to is a deep sense of inner stability, well-being, peace and vitality that is consistent and easy to return to when life tosses an obstacle in ones path.

That sort of happiness brings many benefits. Here is a statement students in our programs can read to help them realize that making their own happiness a priority is far from a selfish act.

When I am happy I am at my best. I am in the best health. I am in the best mood. I am able to think with greater clarity. I am able to see solutions to problems far more readily. I need less from others (pumping up, assistance of all types, etc.). I have better relationships. I am more resilient. I have more energy. I contribute more by being happy so being happy is a priority for me. When I am happy I contribute to others by inspiring them to happiness. I contribute to others because when I feel great I want to help others feel just as wonderful. Sometimes, when someone feels rotten it makes them feel better to see someone else feel rotten too or see someone who is even worse off then they are. When I am happy it lifts me even higher to help others up and I gain no happiness or relief from their not being in a good place. Minding my own happiness is minding my health because when I am happy I will be inclined to make good decisions about my diet, exercise and other habits. Happiness reduces the stress on my body and enables it to more easily maintain or regain its health. My immune system functions better when I am happy. My happiness is good for me and good for the world.

Another common fallacy is that an individual can make another one happy. If you have ever attempted to cheer up someone who had decided they were going to be miserable you know that until the person decided they want to be happy nothing anyone else can do will make a significant difference. Others can certainly contribute greatly to our happiness by providing positive things to focus on but we always have the ability to focus on less pleasing things no matter how pleasing they are being.

There are specific skills and a base of knowledge that can help anyone increase their level of happiness and increase their potential to thrive.

You can do it. Anyone can.


Golden Relationships

This course is designed to increase the knowledge and skills that will help you enjoy a life long loving relationship.

The course name represents the Golden wedding anniversary because we believe this class can contribute greatly to the ability of couples to enjoy 50 or more years together. All are welcome in the course. It is not necessary to come as a couple or to be married. This class will help individuals prepare for great relationships or enjoy the one they already have.

The same skills and knowledge can help you improve all your relationships.

The class is a great wedding or anniversary gift.

If you are ‘in love’ you will know how to keep that loving feeling and if you do find yourself veering off course, you will have skills that can be used to get back on track before you’re in a ditch.

If your relationship has evolved to where you feel more friendship than passionate loving feelings you can use the knowledge and skills to bring back the ‘in love’ feelings.

If the stress of life has made it feel more like your mate is your business partner, figuring out schedules and budgets, it can help you feel more ‘in love’ even in the midst of chaos.

If your relationship is struggling to survive the knowledge and skills may be able to bring it back to that loving feeling.

If your relationship has ended the knowledge and skills can help you make the next one the one you’ve been dreaming about.

Its goal is to increase happiness, optimism, emotional intelligence, resilience, self mastery, and well-being and improve relationships.

You will feel more empowered and feel more confident in your ability to sustain a loving relationship with your mate. Many of the same skills can be utilized to improve other relationships.

We design the time and location of this class to make it easy to have a date night after class so that couples attending together can enjoy one another and have time to talk about any insights they experienced as a result of the class.

The benefits of increased happiness are tremendous. You will learn why relationships are easier when you are happy.

Happiness also provides health benefits including 50% risk reduction for heart disease, reduced risk for some cancers, reduced risk of diabetes and Alzheimer’s, improved immune function, fewer colds and flu and so much more. See our website for more information on the scientifically proven benefits.

Taking this class is a wise decision. . Your life will be better because of it.

The terms we use to refer to areas the class will benefit are defined differently by different people. This is especially true of happiness. Our meanings are reflected below.

Happiness is a deep sense of inner stability, well-being, peace and vitality that is consistent and reliable.

Resilience is an individual’s ability to cope with stress and adversity. Increased resilience helps individuals recover from setbacks (illness, depression, adversity, etc. ) faster than they would without the coping strategies that our course strengthens.

Emotional Intelligence is the ability to effectively understand oneself and others which impacts the ability to relate well to people and higher EQ levels help individuals be more successful in meeting the demands and pressures of life.

Optimism is an inclination to project a positive point of view upon actions and events and to anticipate favorable outcomes. Optimists tend to be much more successful than pessimists and to experience better health throughout life.

Self Mastery is the ability to be aware of your emotions and rule them rather than have them rule you. Self mastery is the ability to make the most out of your physical, mental, and spiritual health, to be the best you can be.

Well-Being ~ high levels of well-being mean that we are more able to respond to difficult circumstances, to innovate and constructively engage with other people and the world around us. As well as representing a highly effective way of bringing about good outcomes in many different areas our lives, there is also a strong case for regarding well-being as an ultimate goal of human endeavor. It contributes to the individual ability to realize his or her own potential, to cope with the normal stresses of life, to work productively and fruitfully, and the ability to make a contribution to her or his community.

 

 


Go Confidently in the Direction of your Future

Go Confidently in the direction of your future

Live the life of your dreams

Learn how in this course, designed to increase resilience, self mastery, optimism, happiness, emotional intelligence, and well-being.

The same skills and knowledge can help you improve all your relationships.

You will feel more empowered and feel more confident in your ability to succeed in anything you set your mind to.

Young adults face many challenges. You are making decisions about your future both when you choose a college and when you decide whether or not to participate in particular activities.

For some, peer pressure exerts undue influence and leads them away from their real goals. This class will help you feel more confident about where you really want to go and what you want to do. The tools provided are effective, even in the moment, to help you stay on track.

Science has demonstrated that increasing happiness literally makes you smarter. You will do better on examinations, including the SAT, when you are happy than when you are not happy.

Your decisions about exercise, nutrition, getting adequate sleep and even crime and substance abuse will be healthier when you experience generally positive emotions.

Depression is at epidemic levels around the world and the rates are especially high for teens and young adults. The good news is that you live at the perfect time. Many branches of science have been exploring happiness and resilience. We have taken the best of that leading edge science and used that knowledge to develop our courses. We believe this class will equip you with skills and tools to greatly reduce your risk of depression and which would shorten the duration of depression should it still occur.

It has been shown that depression during pregnancy has many adverse impacts on the baby including sleep and behavior problems, depression and asthma. These scientific findings point to the importance of learning these skills. In fact, depression has been shown to be a risk factor for teen pregnancy.

The benefits provided by this class have been shown to increase many life skills that make the difference between a mediocre life where dreams are put aside and one where thriving is the order of the day.

We want you to thrive. We know you can. All you need is some knowledge and skills.

Almost every other course you have ever taken has been focused on providing you with knowledge that it has been determined will help you please others. This course is focused on empowering you, giving you the tools and knowledge you need to be successful. Some would say this is selfishly oriented. We (and science) disagree. When you are capable of managing your own life you require fewer resources from others and science has shown that when individuals are happy they are far more likely to help others. The bottom line is that science has shown that an individuals happiness does not just benefit that individual but also his or her family, friends, co-workers and community.

Your very capacity for kindness and ability to love will increase.

The benefits of increased happiness are tremendous. You will learn why relationships are easier when you are happy.

Happiness also provides health benefits including 50% risk reduction for heart disease, reduced risk for some cancers, reduced risk of diabetes and Alzheimer’s, improved immune function, fewer colds and flu and so much more. See our website for more information on the scientifically proven benefits.

Many will tell you to be more positive. We do not just tell you, we show you how.

 

We have over 50 skills and techniques that can be used to increase your happiness in the moment and to become happier naturally for the long-term. Some of the techniques can also be applied to improve your results in sports.

Taking this class is a wise decision. Your life will be better because of it.

Please click on our program tab for additional course information and to register for this life changing program.

The terms we use to refer to areas the class will benefit are defined differently by different people. This is especially true of happiness. Our meanings are reflected below.

Happiness is a deep sense of inner stability, well-being, peace and vitality that is consistent and reliable.

Resilience is an individual’s ability to cope with stress and adversity. Increased resilience helps individuals recover from setbacks (illness, depression, adversity, etc. ) faster than they would without the coping strategies that our course strengthens.

Emotional Intelligence is the ability to effectively understand oneself and others which impacts the ability to relate well to people and higher EQ levels help individuals be more successful in meeting the demands and pressures of life.

Optimism is an inclination to project a positive point of view upon actions and events and to anticipate favorable outcomes. Optimists tend to be much more successful than pessimists and to experience better health throughout life.

Self Mastery is the ability to be aware of your emotions and rule them rather than have them rule you. Self mastery is the ability to make the most out of your physical, mental, and spiritual health, to be the best you can be.

Well-Being ~ high levels of well-being mean that we are more able to respond to difficult circumstances, to innovate and constructively engage with other people and the world around us. As well as representing a highly effective way of bringing about good outcomes in many different areas our lives, there is also a strong case for regarding well-being as an ultimate goal of human endeavor. It contributes to the individual ability to realize his or her own potential, to cope with the normal stresses of life, to work productively and fruitfully, and the ability to make a contribution to her or his community.


A Happier You

A Happier You

~ Benefits everyone in your life ~

Your increased happiness benefits your family, your friends,

your community, your health, well-being, and success.

This course is designed to increase resilience, self mastery, optimism, happiness, emotional intelligence, well-being and improve relationships.See the programs tab to check out the course offerings and register to make your life better.

You will understand and be able to implement the keys to sustainable happiness.

You will feel more empowered and feel more confident in your ability to succeed in anything you set your mind to.

The benefits provided by this class have been shown to increase many life skills that make the difference between a mediocre life where dreams are put aside and one where thriving is the order of the day.

We want you to thrive. We know you can. All you need is some knowledge and skills.

Some would say increasing your happiness is selfishly oriented. We (and science) disagree. When you are capable of managing your own life you require fewer resources from others and science has shown that when individuals are happy they are far more likely to help others. The bottom line is that science has shown that an individuals happiness does not just benefit that individual but also his or her family, friends, co-workers and community.

Your very capacity for kindness and ability to love will increase.

The benefits of increased happiness are tremendous. You will learn why relationships are easier when you are happy.

Happiness also provides health benefits including 50% risk reduction for heart disease, reduced risk for some cancers, reduced risk of diabetes and Alzheimer’s, improved immune function, fewer colds and flu and so much more. See our website for more information on the scientifically proven benefits.

It has been shown that depression during pregnancy has many adverse impacts on the baby including sleep and behavior problems, depression, and asthma. These scientific findings point to the importance of learning these skills.

Many will tell you to be more positive. We do not just tell you, we show you how.

You’re made a wise decision. Your life will be better because of it.

Click on the Programs tab for course and registration information.

The terms we use to refer to areas the class will benefit are defined differently by different people. This is especially true of happiness. Our meanings are reflected below.

Happiness is a deep sense of inner stability, well-being, peace and vitality that is consistent and reliable.

Resilience is an individual’s ability to cope with stress and adversity. Increased resilience helps individuals recover from setbacks (illness, depression, adversity, etc. ) faster than they would without the coping strategies that our course strengthens.

Emotional Intelligence is the ability to effectively understand oneself and others which impacts the ability to relate well to people and higher EQ levels help individuals be more successful in meeting the demands and pressures of life.

Optimism is an inclination to project a positive point of view upon actions and events and to anticipate favorable outcomes. Optimists tend to be much more successful than pessimists and to experience better health throughout life.

Self Mastery is the ability to be aware of your emotions and rule them rather than have them rule you. Self mastery is the ability to make the most out of your physical, mental, and spiritual health, to be the best you can be.

Well-Being ~ high levels of well-being mean that we are more able to respond to difficult circumstances, to innovate and constructively engage with other people and the world around us. As well as representing a highly effective way of bringing about good outcomes in many different areas our lives, there is also a strong case for regarding well-being as an ultimate goal of human endeavor. It contributes to the individual ability to realize his or her own potential, to cope with the normal stresses of life, to work productively and fruitfully, and the ability to make a contribution to her or his community.


All of our course offerings provide health and well-being benefits

All of our course offerings provide health and well-being benefits

The benefits of increased positive emotions, optimism and happiness extend to all areas of life.

Scientists in many fields have been working, primarily in the past 20 years, on discovering the benefits of happiness. The results have been conclusive and surprising.

Positive emotions, optimism and happiness have positive impacts on health, well-being, relationships, emotional intelligence, creativity, cognitive ability, decision-making, resilience, substance abuse, crime, teen pregnancy, immune system function, and of course, depression.

 


Veterans Courses

Veterans Courses

We have great appreciation for the willingness of veterans to serve their country.

We are also aware that such service sometimes involves exposure to experiences that have had adverse repercussions for many including PTSD.

We KNOW that post adversarial growth (greater growth than would have been anticipated in the individual following a traumatic experience) is also a possibility after such traumatic experiences.

We believe that our courses can help veterans (and others) be more likely to enjoy the benefits of post traumatic growth instead the symptoms of PTSD.

From time to time we may provide special offers to veterans as a show of appreciation. In the Spring of 2012 we offered free classs to 1,000 veterans. Future offers may be different, may involve discounts, etc. We will announce any future offers on our website.

We would be more than happy to partner with veteran organizations to help veterans.


Is Your Community at Peace?

Is Your Community at Peace?

Is your community at peace or does it feel more like war or a cold war?

Regardless of how you define ‘your community’ you, your family, and your children deserve to live in peace.

Science has shown again and again that increasing positive emotions, optimism, and happiness is good for communities.

Crime goes down.

Teen pregnancy is reduced.

Some multi-generation issues do not occur (depression in the expecting Mom can cause behavioral and sleep problems for the baby and increase risk of asthma and depression in th child).

Even racism is shown to decrease with increased positivity.

Programs can be designed to help communities create a healthier environment for everyone.

Increased positivity is the road to peace, whether you are speaking of your home, your neighborhood, your school, or the world.

We offer two 1-hour programs designed to increase peace, free to organizations on a space available basis.


Some of the Scientifically Proven Benefits of Happiness

Some of the Scientifically Proven Benefits of Happiness

The benefits of increased positive emotions, optimism and happiness extend to all areas of life.

Scientists in many fields have been working, primarily in the past 20 years, on discovering the benefits of happiness. The results have been conclusive and surprising.

Positive emotions, optimism and happiness have positive impacts on health, well-being, relationships, emotional intelligence, creativity, cognitive ability, decision-making, resilience, substance abuse, crime, teen pregnancy, imune system function, and of course, depression.

Some Scientifically Shown Benefits of Increased Happiness

Positive emotions, optimism, and happiness have been scientifically shown to:

· Reduce the risk of developing cardiovascular disease by 50%[i]

· Provide a protective defense against breast cancer[ii]

· Increase resilience “We contend that the cognitive broadening that accompanies states of positive emotion expands and improves the ways people cope during crises”. [iii]

· Increase problem solving abilities and negotiating skills[iv]

· Have the potential to create chains of events that carry positive meaning for others, positive emotions can trigger upward spirals that transform communities into more cohesive, moral and harmonious social organizations. [v]

· Reduce stress which is being researched as contributing to Alzheimer’s disease[vi] and [vii]

· Be the best coping strategies for life’s ‘downs’. [viii]

· Significantly reduces risk of stroke (study only considered optimism)[ix]

· Improved relationships of all types[x]

· Increase success[xi]

· Research suggests that negativity in social relationships is an important predictor

· of (adverse) mental health in its own right[xii]

 

This is just a sample of the scientifically proven benefits. Research has found enough benefits to fill several books. I apologize for the copious citations but I wanted you to see that the statements are based upon solid research.

• Improved immune system function

• Reduced risk of heart disease and stroke

• Reduced risk of Type II diabetes

• Reduced risk of Alzheimer’s disease

• Reduced risk of depression

• Reduced incident of illness

• Shorter duration when illness occurs

• Reduced inflammatory response to stress

• Increased longevity

• Lower blood pressure

• Less pain

• Improved sleep

• Greater resiliency and adaptability

• More likely to make good choices

• Increased creativity

• Increased success

• Increased productivity

• Increased optimism

• Improved relationships of all types

• Improved social support networks

• Feel love and appreciation more

• More likely to marry

• More likely to be happily married

• Become more likable

• Greater clarity of thinking; the mind sees more possibilities

• Increased ability to see the ‘big picture’

All of our course offerings provide health and well-being benefits

Citations and greater details are in programs and books by Jeanine Joy available on Amazon and other fine book sellers.

 

[i]Boehm, J. K. , & Kubzansky, L. D. The heart’s content: The association between positive psychological well-being and cardiovascular health. Psychological Bulletin, April 2012

AmericanAcademyof Neurology (2001, July 13). Keeping up your overall health may keep dementia away, study suggests. Science Daily

Cardiovascular disease is a risk factor for Alzheimer’s so this risk is also reduced. AmericanAcademyof Neurology (2001, July 13). Keeping up your overall health may keep dementia away, study suggests. Science Daily.

[ii]Ronit Peled, Devora Carmil, Orly Siboni-Samocha and Ilana Shoham-Vardi. Breast cancer, psychological distress and life events among young women. BMC Cancer

[iii]What good are positive emotions in crisis? A prospective study of resilience and emotions following the terrorist attacks on the United States on September 11th, 2001. Fredrickson, Barbara L. ; Tugade, Michele M. ; Waugh, Christian E. ; Larkin, Gregory R. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, Vol 84(2), Feb 2003, 365-376. doi: 10. 1037/0022-3514. 84. 2. 365

[iv]Content analyses revealed that physicians who felt good were faster to integrate case information and less likely to become anchored on initial thoughts or come to premature closure in their diagnosis. In yet another experiment, Isen and colleagues showed that negotiators induced to feel good were more likely to discover integrative solutions in a complex bargaining task. Overall, 20 years of experiments by

Isen and her colleagues show that when people feel good, their thinking becomes more creative, integrative, flexible and open to information. The Value of Positive Emotions. Barbara L. Fredrickson, Ph. D.

[v]The Value of Positive Emotions. Barbara L. Fredrickson, Ph. D.

[vi]Ioannis Sotiropoulos, Caterina Catania, Lucilia G. Pinto, Rui Silva, G. Elizabeth Pollerberg, Akihiko Takashima, Nuno Sousa, and Osborne F. X. Almeida. Stress Acts Cumulatively to Precipitate Alzheimer’s Disease-Like Tau Pathology and Cognitive Deficits. Journal of Neuroscience, May 25, 2011; 31(21):7840-7847 DOI:10. 1523/JNEUROSCI. 0730-11. 2011

[vii]Robert A. Rissman, PhD, assistant professor of neurosciences, said the findings may at least partly explain why clinical studies have found a strong link between people prone to stress and development of sporadic Alzheimer’s disease (AD), which accounts for up to 95 percent of all AD cases in humans. Robert A. Rissman, Michael A. Staup, Allyson Roe Lee, Nicholas J. Justice, Kenner C. Rice, Wylie Vale, and Paul E. Sawchenko. Corticotropin-releasing factor receptor-dependent effects of repeated stress on tau phosphorylation, solubility, and aggregation. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, 2012 DOI: 10. 1073/pnas. 1203140109


Is Your Child Happy?

An Open Letter to Parents Regarding the Happiness of Their Children

Does your child’s happiness matter? As parents we want the best for our children. We willingly make many sacrifices to ensure they have not only what they need but opportunities we want them to have.

Why do we do this? In the final analysis, whether it is good grades, a college education, a car, being on a winning team or a wide circle of friends the reason is that we believe they will be happier in the having of the experience, education or thing. We want our children to be healthy, happy, and productive.

In our opinion every parent would benefit from being aware of the new research on happiness.

I will share some of the relative details of that research including:

  • Happy children have better relationships
  • Happy children do better in school
  • Happy children do better on examinations including the SAT
  • Happy children are healthier
  • Happy children are more likely to accomplish their goals
  • Happy children are less likely to become addicted to drugs and alcohol
  • Happy children are less like to get pregnant
  • Happy children are less likely to commit crimes

Happy children do better in school and on examinations including SAT examinations. Scientists have actually demonstrated that happiness increases our level of both intelligence and creativity. The same individual is not an intelligent or creative when they are in a negative state of mind as they are when they are in a positive state of mind.

Don’t worry. I am not about to suggest that you give in to every whim your child has in order to ‘keep him or her happy’. In fact, happiness does not work that way. It is not about ‘getting your way’ but about how you respond to the circumstances of your life. It is what I call the ‘back-story’ you tell yourself.

For example, take two children who want the same thing and their parent tells them they cannot have it. A negatively focused child might, in their own mind, explain your unwillingness to allow them to have the desired thing by telling themselves things such as “Mom/Dad would let me have this thing I want if they loved me; they must not love me” or “I must be a disappointment to Mom/Dad; if they were proud of me they would let me have this thing I want” and so on. You can see where those thoughts lead. They lead to low self esteem and associated problems including depression.

On the other hand, the positively focused child might, in their own mind, explain your unwillingness to allow them to have the desired thing by telling themselves things such as “Mom/Dad would let me have this if they thought it was best for me; maybe I can help them see the benefits of my having this thing”, or “Even though they said no today they may change their mind” or “Maybe Grandma or Grandpa will get this thing I want for my birthday”, or “Maybe I could earn the money and get this thing I want myself”.

As you read the types of thoughts a negatively focused child might have and imagine others along those same lines also think about the drama and anxiety that might be associated with the thoughts.

The negatively focused child, if they have tied how much their parent loves them to the outcome of getting this thing or not will experience the parents’ unwillingness to provide the thing as a severe emotional blow (and rightly so considering what they have tied to the outcome).

The positively focused child feels secure in being loved, would never think to tie being loved or not to a question of receiving something. These feelings really have little or nothing to do with the parents’ behaviors but with the back story the child tells him or herself. An average parent with a child that has developed this type of back story cannot change their behavior enough to make the child feel more love. The child has to change the back story in order to feel the love that is already there.

The interesting thing about back stories is that we all create them to explain things that happen in our world. There are as many different back stories to every situation as there are people.

Listen to your own thoughts as you move through your day. If someone is rude to you how do you explain it to yourself in the privacy of your own mind? Do you see the world as full of rude people or do you shrug it off as that person having a bad day and taking it out on someone who just happens to be handy?

If you receive a promotion was it luck, your hard work, your education, who you know, right place and right time or something else?

Everyone creates back stories for events in their life. It is something we usually do unconsciously. Most of us do not say to ourselves “What sort of back story am I going to tell myself about this situation?” and then create one that makes us feel good. We could do this but most of us do not. Then we begin believing the back-story we tell ourselves and will staunchly defend the truth of our back story which is just something we made up to make sense of something and then thought about repeatedly.

Another interesting thing is that most of us do not talk about our back stories as such. We do not have conversations that are that deep into the privacy of our own minds.

When we are more consciously aware that we are creating back stories we have the opportunity to question them before they become rooted as beliefs. For example, the child who first ties being loved to receipt of some ‘thing’ could, if the child understood back stories, ask the parent or another trusted source if that back story that feels so awful is true and avoid thoughts that would fester and create trouble in the future.

That is enough about back stories for now. They are just one aspect of how a negatively focused individual experiences the same situation so differently than a positively focused person experiences the same circumstances.

Let’s return to the fact that happy people (children and adults) do better in school and on examinations than those who are not. So, if one of your dominant desires for your child is to do well in school so they will be happy would you not want to help them learn to be happy now so they can do better in school?

Depression has reached epidemic levels in America with 1 in 10 individuals experiencing depression[1] and depression being rampant among those in the 18 – 24[2] year range.

Learning how to be more optimistic has been demonstrated to both help alleviate depression and prevent depression. There is a separate letter in the Benefits section of our website which is focused on depression that you may wish to read.

Good relationships are very important to a life that feels good. Science has also shown that happier individuals have better relationships including family, friends, co-workers and other loved ones. There are too many factors that impact relationships to cover them here but if you consider the ‘back-story’ example above you can clearly see how the negatively focused individual is not feeling the love even if it is there. Many people suffer from feeling unloved when they are very loved. It is their back-stories that interfere with being able to feel loved. Happier individuals are also more likeable and tend to be able to maintain friendships and other relationships in healthier and more satisfying states.

Finally, the benefits of happiness on health are tremendous. In one study, which I am very glad I did not participate in, positively focused and negatively focused individuals were deliberately infected with the same cold virus. They were also kept in an isolated floor of a hotel for monitoring throughout the experiment. The results were astounding.

All the negatively focused individuals became ill. Some of the positively focused individuals did not become ill.

The positively focused individuals who did become ill suffered fewer symptoms and a shorter duration illness than the negatively focused individuals. Because they had isolated the participants they were even able to measure true symptoms (not just reported symptoms).

This and other studies have shown a direct correlation between immune system function and level of positivity.

Other studies have shown that individuals in like circumstances who are more positively focused can live as much as 10 years longer than those who are negatively focused even when family history is considered. Additionally, those who were positively focused were more likely to remain fully functioning until much closer to death than those who were negatively focused. The chronic and debilitating illnesses tended to impact those who were negatively focused.

Other research has shown that the risk of ailments such as heart disease, high blood pressure, diabetes, depression, and Alzheimer’s are reduced with increased levels of happiness.

Regardless of whether your desire for your child is just not missing class due to illness as much or a longer and healthier life increasing happiness now can have positive impacts on all of these things.

The positive impact of increased happiness on an individual is tremendous. It will improve their relationships, their results in school and their health and general well-being.

Our classes are available for individuals age 16 and up and mature 14 year olds are welcome to attend classes with their parent(s) if both/all are enrolled.

Please consider giving your child the gift of happiness. Your child’s happiness matters.

See our programs tab for information on classes. We are also available for programs in schools.

Closing with a sincere wish for a happy life and all that entails for you and your child.

Sincerely,

 

 

Jeannine Joy, President

Happiness 1st Institute

For Younger Children

Please Note: In the future classes for younger children will be developed. If you are interested in classes for younger children please let us know as demand can influence the resources we put towards development of the course. We would also be interested in hearing about your experiences with younger children, what worked and what did not, to help us develop effective tools and techniques to help them.

For now the best we can do for younger children is recommend some reading material.

For the parent:

Martin Seligman’s “The Optimistic Child” as reading material to parents of younger children.

For the child:

We like:

S. M. Mawe’s “Dandelion: The Extraordinary Life of a Misfit”

“The Little Engine That Could” - Any age appropriate version should be good

 

[1] Healthline, What is Depression, Retrieved on December 8, 2011, from http://www. healthline. com/health/depression-overview

[2] Tartakovsky, M. (2008). Depression and Anxiety Among College Students. Psych Central. Retrieved on December 8, 2011, from http://psychcentral. com/lib/2008/depression-and-anxiety-among-college-students/


An Open Letter to Sales Managers About Optimism

An open letter to Sales Managers about Optimism

Did you give your team a test to determine their optimism before you hired them?

Is your team selling as much as you would like them to?

Is turnover a concern?

What are your new hire training costs?

Are you aware of the MetLife studies and successes with hiring optimistic individuals?

MetLife worked in concert with the Father of Positive Psychology, Martin E. P. Seligman[1] to test Seligman’s theory that hiring more optimistic sales people would reduce turnover and increase sales.

The results were very conclusive.

For years MetLife had used standardized industry tests to determine aptitude for selling insurance as a primary tool in deciding who to hire. Turnover was 50% in the first year with a hiring cost of thirty five thousand per person. Sales results were not good and by the end of the 4th year 80% of the new hires were gone.

Scientific research had already shown that pessimists give up faster and more often than optimists. Quitting is a form of giving up.

They decided to experiment. In addition to the standardized industry test they tested the optimism of the applicants.

They had the existing MetLife agents take a questionnaire to measure their level of optimism/pessimism. The results showed a strong correlation between sales success and optimism.

The ten percent who were the most optimistic sold 88% more than the most pessimistic tenth. The most optimistic half sold 37% more in their first two years than the pessimistic half sold.

The first year they tested the optimism of 104 new hires from the same part of the country. At the end of the first year 59 had quit. Taking the 104 on a scale with the most optimistic at the top the least optimistic were twice as likely to have quit during the first year.

The agents in the top half of optimism had sold 20% more than the agents in the lower half. The agents from the top quarter of optimism had sold 50% more than the bottom quarter.

In the next round, fifteen thousand applicants took the optimism test. Then Met Life gambled and hired 127 new agents who had failed the industry standard test but scored very high on the optimism test in addition to hiring 1,000 using the industry standard test and monitoring optimism.

The 127 who had failed the industry standard test but scored high on the optimism test outsold the pessimists hired in the traditional way by 21% the first year and 57% the second year. This special group, who had failed the industry standard test and would not have normally been hired even outsold the optimistic half of the traditional hires by 27% over the first two years.

Finally, it is important to note that the sales of the optimists continued to improve.

Okay, how does this help you? You already have a sales force and yes, you can test future hires but you don’t want to start over. You understand that optimism creates greater persistence in sales people and would like these benefits but how do you get from here to there?

The above study focused upon separating the optimistic from the pessimistic or less optimistic at the time of hiring. It did not address existing staff and their level of optimism.

Since then research has shown that not only can individuals change from being a pessimistic to being more optimistic but that the change is easily sustainable over time.

Beyond being better salespeople who are less likely to look for greener pastures research has also found that optimistic individuals:

  • Are healthier
  • Live longer
  • Think with better clarity
  • Do better in their careers
  • Have better relationships
  • Enjoy life more

Optimistic teams win more often even when the talent on the pessimistic opponent is superior.

It has also been shown that people would prefer their leaders be optimistic[2].

While it is still smart to focus on hiring optimistic individuals for sales roles it is possible to reshape your existing sales force into a more productive team by increasing their level of optimism.

The benefits of optimism are not limited to the sales team. Increases in optimism in all employees provide the benefits desired from typical wellness programs and some benefits that wellness programs do not even attempt to address.

One study demonstrated a 19% increase in accuracy of complex decisions among well educated adults. Can you imagine an executive team that makes decisions that are 19% better?

Happiness 1st Institute is uniquely situated to teach your employees how to be more optimistic.

Our founder had a successful 30+ year career in the insurance, securities and trust world. After learning to be optimistic and becoming very happy in her own life she began teaching others.

We use the best of several fields including Positive Psychology, Emotional Intelligence, Neuroscience, Quantum Physics and ancient wisdom to develop methods that work. Many of these methods have been thoroughly researched with thousands of adults using them to make permanent changes in their levels of optimism, happiness, emotional intelligence and resilience.

Everyone comes from a different perspective. We believe that a combination of proven methods provides a greater chance of success with individuals of diverse backgrounds and different starting points.

We know that increasing the level of optimism in your employees, salespeople, and staff; will result in significant benefits that will contribute directly to the success of your company.

Let’s have a conversation about how increased optimism in your employees could be achieved. You have nothing to loose and much to gain from exploring this idea.

Sincerely,

 

 

 

 

Jeanine Joy, President

[1] As detailed in “Learned Optimism” by Martin E. P. Seligman, Ph. D.

M. Seligman and P. Schulman, “Explanatory Style as a Predictor of Performance as a Life Insurance Agent,” Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 50 (1986)

P. Schulman, M. Seligman, and D. Oran, “Explanatory Style Predicts Productivity Among Life Insurance Agents: The Special Force Study,” (unpublished study available from Foresight, Inc. Falls Church, VA.

[2] Citations for many benefits of happiness are in TRUE Prevention-Optimum Health: Remember Galileo http://www.amazon.com/TRUE-Prevention-Optimum-Remember-Galileo/dp/0615992463/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1399761604&sr=8-1&keywords=true+prevention+galileo

 


An Open Letter about Relationships and Happiness

An Open Letter about Relationships and Happiness

Many individuals seek a relationship because they want to be happy.

Many individuals blame their lack of happiness on the behavior of individuals with whom they have relationships including parents, siblings, friends, children, significant others, friends, and even co workers and neighbors.

‘If only “_________” would be different then I would be happy’ is a common lament.

I can’t be happy because “so and so is doing or won’t do” is another common assertion.

The common element in the above examples is that you have absolutely no control over the behavior of others. When you make your own happiness dependent upon something over which you have no control your happiness becomes an impossible dream.

Others, no matter how much they love us, will not follow our dictates in order to make us happy consistently. They can’t. They have their own desires and goals which may conflict with what we want them to do. They also have other people in their lives who may want them to behave differently than we want them to behave. Making everyone with expectations of your behavior happy is an impossible task if there is more than one other person in your life. It is also a huge burden to put upon your loved ones. It causes stress and conflict for the individual(s) you intend to love when their desires conflict with your expectations. It is conditional love and that does not serve you or them very well.

As a result of the way many people think about relationships they end up with one unsatisfying relationship after another. Often they seem to have the same relationship with a series of different people (same issues, different faces).

There are ways, within your control, that will allow you to have better relationships in your life.

Your happiness level has a great impact on the quality of the relationships in your life.

Your happiness level has a significant impact on how you perceive the actions of others. When you are happy there are many things that others can do that won’t bother you at all that you would find very bothersome when you are not happy. Your level of happiness actually impacts how you perceive your relationships.

Likewise, the happiness level of those with whom you have relationships impacts how they perceive you. If you are in a relationship with someone who is generally unhappy they are very likely finding fault with you.

One of the good things that scientists have discovered about happiness is that it tends to be contagious.

We can teach you how to be happier and then your increased happiness can have a positive influence on others in your life.

Happy people also have better relationships. In our class you’ll understand why it works this way.

When you are unhappy it is often difficult to think clearly. It is scientifically proven that the same person is smarter when happy than when unhappy.

The Keys to Happiness class offered by Happiness 1st Institute will pay dividends throughout your life. Your increased happiness will help you develop better relationships in all areas of life.

Better relationships will make life more fun.

There are many benefits to increased happiness including improved health, and well being, increased emotional intelligence, increased intelligence, increased creativity, higher levels of success, and improved immune system functioning.

Make an investment in your life. Make a commitment to become happier and use that happiness to nurture your relationships. See our website for upcoming classes and additional information. You can learn to take your relationships to new levels right along with your happiness.

Click on the Programs tab to see our class offerings.

You can do it. Anyone can.

Warm Regards,

 

Jeanine Joy, President

Happiness 1st Institute